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I am sorry. As much as this boy reminds me of poor white trash, I am so attracted to him. Is it because he exudes that toughness and masculinity of a Black man? I don't know. I'll tell you this... If only I had millions in the bank, he'd be mine for sure.
Actually, he's Reggie Bush, a professional football player who plays for the New Orleans Saints. His positions are running back, wide receiver, kick returner, and punt returner. I don't know what any of that means, but all's I know is that he can punt on me anytime!
Credit: http://ybf.blogspot.com/
I don’t often get personal on my blog, but
since I have had 2000 people visit my blog within the last month, I think that
I should take advantage of that. I need you guys and gals to help me with some
boyfriend problems that I am having. My boyfriend and I are experiencing a
complete breakdown in communication. Every time a problem arises, we resort to
fighting and verbal abuse. Most recently, my boyfriend revealed to me that he
slept with a female some years ago. It’s not so much that it was a girl that
has me up in arms. Rather, it is only now that he has not disclosed this
information. We have been dating for a year and for that year I have asked
him to tell me about his sexual history. He has been secretive in not giving me
the total number of partners that he has slept with, so I have become
increasing resentful and distrustful. I can’t seem to understand why he has
resisted my inquiries. Moreover, since I disclosed my sexual encounters with
men and women, why hasn’t he been able to tell me the truth? It’s not like most
gay men have not had some sexual encounter with a female at some point in their
lives. He does not even want to hint that he’s been close to doing something
with a female. Instead, he evades the topic altogether. Our sex life is close
to non-existent. Is this because he’s really bisexual and does not want to tell
me the truth because he’s afraid that I will leave him? I describe our sex
lives as on and off. Though, when it’s on, it seems unnatural, like I am having
sex with a friend instead of a guy that I am head-over-heels for. I just don’t
understand. He does not communicate with me about why he does not seem to want
to have sex with me. It’s not like I am fat or ugly. I am average looking, with
a good build. Noting defined, but nothing is out of place. When we argue, it’s
just awful. We end up getting in each other’s face and saying things that we
later regret, like I told him he was jealous of me. How do we learn to
understand the problems that are plaguing our relationship in a respectful and
adult manner? How do I get to the bottom of why he does not want to tell me the
truth about his sexual history? Can I correctly assume that he is keeping
secrets because he wants to hide something? Why aren’t we having sex more
often?
I had a very strange experience with Julian Bond today. He
was washing his hands at the sink when I entered the bathroom. This is all
happening at the
As it turns out, none of my explanations are particularly important. The problem is that we common folk often expect too much of our celebrities, like they are somehow not human like us. In my case, because this celebrity is African American and is well known as a civil rights leader, I wanted to be treated as if I were his biggest fan, best friend, and mother put into one. It reminds me of an incident that Oprah had with a fan. Oprah had made an unexpected trip to a department store. When everyone got wind that Oprah was in the building, of course, they all lined up to see OPRAH grace their presence! Well, Oprah was not havin’ it. She needed to rush in the store and pick up a gift really quickly because she had a wedding to attend. One fan called her a bitch as she walked by because Oprah didn’t bother to greet her fans. One could say that Oprah was being a bitch, but there is also another way to look at it. If it was you, would you not want to go in a store and come out without people parading around you and bowing at your feet?
I guess that I shouldn’t be like that fan. At least Julian Bond did say something.
This was An Amazing Speech!
See It Again!
I felt that I needed to say this because its significance demonstrates a fact not only about the way Americans view gay people, but how Americans even gay Americans view gay minorities. I was extremely hard pressed to come up the group above. In fact, I don't even consider some of them like Carey and Dwight to be celebrities. The reason I was hard pressed is that Black gay men and women do not get the exposure that our white counterparts do. To prove my point, I am now going to come with 15 names of gay white men and women on the spot without using the Internet or anything.
All the guys from Queer Eye 1) Ted 2) Carson and 3) Thom. Then there is the guy who played Dougie Houser..something 4) Patrick. There is 5) Lance Bass from N'Sync and 6) and his boyfriend who was on Surivivor or Amazing Race, one of those shows. 7) There is the guy from Grey's Anatomy. 8) There is Chasity Bono 9) Ellen DeGeneres and her girlfriend 10) Di Rossi or something like that 11) Rosie ODonnell. There is the guy who was in the movie version of Xmen. He played the doctor in the wheelchair. It think his name is 12) Kan, I know his last name or first name begins with a K. 13) There is Dick Cheney's daughter who is about to have a kid. I would consider her a celebrity. 14) There is Graham Norton There is the guy who played 15) Emmett on Queer as Folk. Also the guy who played Justin on 16) Queer as Folk.
There you have it folks, 16 names in 16 minutes! It took me hours to come up with this group of African American men and women and I had to use the Internet! The point here is clear.
White gay people and specifically white gay men are overexposed!
This is the most sensational news I have heard in a very long time! Apparently, Clay Aiken logged onto the gay website ManHunt to cruise for guys and believe it or not, There's PROOF! What makes this situation so god damn scandalous is that Aiken has refused to confirm his sexuality by either dismissing the question altogether or by saying that he is straight. Now, according to the recent gossip given to us by the Juice Queen himself Perez Hilton, Clay apparently registered as happychappy2 and got on webcam with a guy who then told the whole damn world. The point here is that you don't tell Perez Hilton anything if you don't want the whole world to know about it! Let me just say for the record to Clay, people will love you regardless!
Go Over to Perez Hilton.com For More Details!
Is Clay Cruising For Gay Sex? 
Topics Covered in This Episode
*State of the Union Address
*Oprah Responds to Critics
*I Resurrect Tocqueville
*Americans Fail Our Democracy
*Hillary Clinton Bores Her Fans
*I Love New York
Download Audio Version
I challenge you to come up with your own answer to the question,
"What I want for the United States is..."
Once you get started, you will realize that there is a lot of work for us to get done as a nation. It's not just about environmental policies or tax laws, you will see that your answers will try to get at the question of who we really are as Americans. Try it. See what you come up with. Here are mine.
>An American historical narrative that Accounts for the Influence of African Americans and other minority groups. (And if you think that there is nothing, pick up a copy of “African American Lives” or “Before the Mayflower.”)
>A Republican Democracy that Represents the Diversity of its Citizens.
>An End to the Tyrannical Rule of White Men Over the Rest of Us.
>An End to the Classification of Citizens into Loaded Group Labels like Black and White.
>A Government That Invests More in Freedom and Equality at Home Than Abroad
>A Government That Moderates the Will of the Majority in an Effort to Protect The Minority
>A Society That Does Not Tolerate Intolerance Directed at Any Specific Person on Account of His or Her Being or at Any Group Based on Generalizations
>A Society That Values Its Complexity and Does Not Seek to Reduce This in Any Way
>A Government That Obligates Organizations Therein to Exercise Just and Rational Choice in Who Shares Power and Privilege
>A Government That Orders All Organizations Therein To Take Steps That Ensure that Representational Principles of Mutual Respect, Honor, and Responsibility Are Rights Entitled to Every Citizen
>An End to the Tyrannical Rule of White People Over the Rest of Us
>An New Era of American Democracy That is Truly Democratic and Representative
Justine Simmons, the wife of Rev Run, has
recently written a children’s book entitled, “God, Can You Hear Me?” She hopes
to encourage children to mature their spiritual well-being by establishing a
relationship with God. This is remarkable for a woman who was dealt a serious
blow when her infant, Victoria, died within hours of being born in September of
2006. MTV will follow the tragedy when Run’s House begins its third season.
There is speculation that its season premiere will be in April, but nothing has
been confirmed.
If I asked you what country had the second largest Black population in the world, what would you say? Nigeria? Nope. That’s number one. Kenya? No. Brazil? Hell no. Well, as it turns out Brazil, the world’s fifth largest country has one of the world’s largest Black populations. Now, race does not have the same connotation in Brazil as it does in the United States, with African Americans maintaining a relative strong sense of identity and community. It is estimated that Afro-Brazilians comprise 45%-50% of the population, which takes into account the biological not cultural or emotional African ancestry of Brazilians. Needless to say, Afro-Brazilian identity is problematic and complex. Nevertheless, the similarities between Brazil and the United States run very deep. The Black population was enslaved in both countries for an extended period of time. It lasted in Brazil from the sixteenth century to the end of the nineteenth century in 1888. The United States held Blacks in slavery from the seventeenth century until 1865. As a result of slavery, both populations experienced difficulties in drawing consistent physical and ancestral links other than superficial characteristics like economic status and skin pigmentation. Brazil especially suffers from the complex nature of being Black in Brazil. They designate terms to differentiate between Afro-Brazilians with freckles, ones with “European” features, ones with “African” features, ones who have African features but who are not “African,” etc. The same goes for the Black population in the United States but to a lesser extent. There are terms like “high yella” and “light skinned” but generally the term Black suffices. It does not in Brazil. The point here is that both countries’ Black population is not purely “Black”. Rather, the history of miscegenation has produced a racially integrated society even on the level of the individual. Despite the fact that I call myself Black, I know what I am at least 1/8 Native American and that I have white on my maternal side of the family. When it comes to the history of global slavery, Brazil teaches us a lot about the development of slavery in the United States. Portuguese/Brazilian share of the slave trade accounted for 45.9% of all slaves taken from Africa. We thought the few million brought to the United States was a lot. What is so amazing about the Brazil and the United States is that they are such a compliment to each other. For example, you have slaves used on a much smaller scale in the United States than in Brazil’s much larger sugar plantations. Cultural retention of African traditions is much more articulated in Brazil than in the United States. Also, another complimentary aspect has to do with the ways in which Afro-Brazilians define Brazilian culture, whereas in the United States the contribution of African Americans to American culture is more controversial and subtle. These countries are so interesting to study together because we can’t help but to allow ourselves to more objectively understand U.S. slavery, what is was and was not.
Jenry Bejarano is an American Idol contestant who I suspect we will hear a lot about. He can sing and...Well, let me just say the obvious. He ain't bad on the eyes. He'll probably go far if he doesn't fuck up in Hollywood. This guy is from Rotterdam, New York and comes from a Bolivian family that adopted him as an infant. Ain't it amazing how our assumptions about people can be totally off! I thought this guy was at least 22 and raised by an African American family. Boy was I wrong! BTW, he was 16 years old when he auditioned. Now I do want to note that Paula may have her lustful eyes on this one. Paula Abdul said “I’m really surprised. I’m pleasantly surprised, because being sixteen years old, in tune, nice texture to your voice, it’s beautiful, and you know, you’re easy on the eyes as they say.” Hell, if she screwed around with Corey Clark, then there is no doubt in my mind that she'll at least entertain relations with a guy who is ten times more talented and attractive. In any case, this guy just might be the next American Idol.
This is a great clip of Jennifer Hudson singing a song from the Dreamgirls soundtrack. You can hear Whitney Houston in the beginning encouraging her.
We Americans often think that we somehow invented freedom. It is true that the freedoms extended to citizens through our Bill of Rights is unprecedented in human historical development, but I don’t think that we have given much consideration to what this idea can mean. We limit freedom to political emancipation, economic mobility, and right to chose. I dare say that freedom involves so much. Even my ability here to exhaust my thoughts in the wee hours of the morning suggests a notion of freedom that frankly is somewhat foreign to us. We don’t think of or rather don’t take seriously freedom in terms of intellectual emancipation or cultural emancipation or even behavioral emancipation. Sure these ideas are tossed around as inherent within freedom as such. To be anything these days, one has to follow a process of indoctrination, which inevitably leads to numbness and self-constraint. What ever happened to writing a poem without feeling the burden of “doing it right?” What ever happened to the freedom of intellectual creativity and engagement without the shame of not having that masters or that doctorate? We talk freedom in this country, but show me where the masses are emancipated? The minds of a few men do not estimate the minds of the many. To be sure, I am college-educated, but education does not give man his freedom. It does not excite his genius. In fact, it clouds it. Education, at least American education, corners men to engage in subjects that choke off his freedom to do and to be. It discourages men to not attempt that which is not favorable to his mental faculties. When do we ever say, “I do therefore I am.” Why don’t we teach ourselves to be free, free of institutional standards and cultural demands? Even if the end-result does not push civilization to some ultimate desirable end, why isn’t freedom for its own sake a sacred right? If a child stirs because he is unsure if the world is just and fair, does he have that freedom? Or will he be assured that people are good and wholesome? For me, life is a bit more complex. I seek out an African American worldview. Even if I shall find it, I will never have the respectability of the ones whom I desire without a paper stating that I have been brainwashed and that I should not pose that much of a threat. I want freedom to do and to be.
I would like to disagree with the claim that “Dreamgirls”
was snubbed by the Academy in not being nominated for Best Picture. We can all
agree that the movie has great music. Additionally, we can all agree that
Jennifer Hudson and Eddie Murphy gave outstanding performances. When it comes
down to it, however, there were many more loose ends, than tight ones. The film
did not come together as a cohesive piece. In fact, the director seems to
experiment throughout the entire movie in a way that makes the film seem like a
disjointed skeleton. The hands are where the feet are supposed to be. The spine
is absent altogether. Nothing seems to be in the right place. Let’s talk about
Jamie Foxx’s character, Curtis. The importance of Curtis is that he is the
narrative thread that connects the whole movie. Curtis is the one who oversees
the group’s early development, maturity, and disbandment. If not for Curtis,
there would be no center along which the various scenes could align. For
example, the reason why we don’t think that Effie is unimportant even after she
leaves the group is due, in part, to her relational and biological connections
with Curtis. Moreover, Curtis is the only one who sustains the plot at the
height of its complexity. When Deena has ventured on her own and Effie is left
to fend for herself, Curtis becomes the glue that makes sense of why we ought
to follow either character in their post-group lives. Now, the portrayal of
this character will make or break the film. To be frank, Jamie Foxx did not bring anything to the table.
He didn’t develop the character in any meaningful. Curtis was as flat and
boring as a sterile glass of water. Jamie Foxx seemed to think that by saying
lines, he would develop character, but obviously he underrated the centrality of
his character and overrated the adaptability of his acting.
On the
contrary, Jennifer Hudson exceeded our expectations and ended up stealing the
whole film. When she wasn’t present, we craved her desperately. Scenes that
didn’t involve her appeared unnecessarily long and tangential. We recognize
that Jennifer was not entirely developed in her acting, but she upstaged every
single character so that we quickly forgave her. I believe that is part of her
appeal. We are drawn to her natural talent and her commonness. We feel like she
is one of us. When she cries out as Effie in “And I Am Telling You I’m Not
Going” we are moved. We are fixed on her every word, hoping, praying that she
will get some relief. In that five minutes, we are forever changed. The world stops.
And we don’t mind Jennifer assuming the position of the sun. Jennifer not only
takes up the slack that Jamie leaves, but she runs with it. She gives us
acting. She gives us drama. She was almost able to deliver an entire movie by
herself, but there were far too many errors made by the other actors. I talked
about Jamie Foxx. There’s Beyoncé. Do I really need to talk about how Beyoncé
should stick to singing and dancing? Her best scenes are the ones when she’s
either doing one or both of these things. She does not bring anything
interesting nor moving to the character. As far as we know, Deena cannot
possibly be a representation of Diana Ross. Beyoncé’s portrayal of her comes
across as a farce, kind of like trying to pass off bologna as steak. The film
never really comes together. It’s a collection of various scenes with actors
and actresses of varying degrees of talent. The only hope to coalesce these
scenes fails when Foxx does not deliver. The film drags when it does not
feature its most important star, Jennifer Hudson, and excels when there is
singing and dancing. Dreamgirls is a nice attempt, but ultimately it doesn’t
measure up
Let me just say that the President’s State of the Union Address does not mean much. The major news networks may be making a big deal out of it, but the President is really grabbing at straws in proposing policies that are not agreeable to the Democratic Congress. While there is no guarantee that the Democratic Party can get its entire agenda passed this Congress, there is no denying that they are in a better position than the President to enact legislation that would favor a change in U.S. policy in Iraq and the war on terrorism, environmental policies, education, and immigration. There are many issues that the Democratic will have to deal with this session, if they want to continue to increase their chances of presidential and congressional victory in 2008. The Democrats are entering 2007 knowing that they need to get something done. Like the President, they are out to prove something. Again, the Democratic Party has to demonstrate that they are a viable alternative to Bush’s current policies, not only in Iraq, but also in terms of economic growth, which has been pretty damn good during Bush’s presidency. The President has to prove that he is not a lameduck. He is in his last two years. As history has proven, Presidents often lack public and party support in the last two years of a second term. This is nothing new. I am sure that Bush expected that his party members would begin to defect about this time given that they have no guarantee that their party leadership can help them win reelection. What we can realistically expect in 2007 politics is for the Republican Party to disintegrate. Republicans will begin to distance themselves from the President. They will be more willing to work with Democrats. Overall, we should expect more bipartisanship on the part of Democrats, Republicans, and the President. They all want to prove that they can get things done, though for different reasons. The war in Iraq will certainly meet some challenges in Congress from both Republicans and Democrats alike. I do not believe that the President will ultimately bow to public opinion and his party, so we should expect more ad hoc committees in Congress that will investigate failed policies in Iraq. No matter how much the Democrats may throw around the threat, they will not yank the rug from under the President in terms of funding. The President will continue to resist seeing Iraq as a failure. Moreover, he will go to the extreme (92,000 more troops) to prove that his policy is not a failure. It’s Bush’s stubbornness and cowboy mentality that will utterly fail him. He could try to apply a realist model to Iraq, but his ideological convictions can’t convince him that Iraq is winneable without a surge or escalation of U.S. military forces. The fact of the matter is that Iraq is not some country that the international community could care less about. Western European countries are especially interested in the success or failure of Iraq because the unsettling of Iraq could have trickle down effects in Europe; security, immigration, violence, etc. After all, it’s happening right outside their back door. Muslim countries are especially interested in Iraq because of its historical and religious significance and its symbolic value. This symbolism embodies common frustration with the Western world and specifically, the United States in meddling in the affairs of other countries. Needless to say, the simplistic “us versus them” will not cut it. The President unfortunately will never realize this enough to capitalize on the international community’s interest and potential role in Iraq. International cooperation is not a part of this President’s lexicon. As Senator Jim Webb suggests, it will take a Democratic Party to reintroduce this term to presidential politics.
Audio Version of Comments about President
Audio Version of Comments about Webb
Topics in this Episode...
Smoking
Blog Anxiety
Adversity
Relationships
Family
Black Identity
Gay Identity
Black People in Presidential Politics
Democracy
Self-Esteem
God's Non-Existence
NEW FEATURE
We here at Black Gay Journeys are starting a new musical series called "That's Hot!". It's a way for me to share with you my top five songs each week. The songs are not only from the top charts, but they can also include songs from decades ago or new songs that just aren't getting any play. My musical tastes are all over the board so I hope that you can find at least one song that fits your fancy.
Listen Here and on iTunes
This Week's Songs
(The recording has a bit of static. We're still making improvements. Bear with us.)
Reba McIntire "Somebody"
Taylor Hicks "The Runaround"
Chris Daughtry "There and Back Again"
The Fray "How to Save a Life"
Jennifer Hudson "It's All Over"
NEW FEATURE Starting today, I will have a podcast/blog every Saturday to wrap up the previous week's news. You can catch me here at Black Gay Journeys or cover all the big stuff like who said what about who or what big thing happened in some city that I can only dream about going to, but also the stuff that has luckily stayed out of the papers, like my personal drama. It's going to be a fun experience. I hope you'll join me! It's a show where nothing is off limits! I mean nothing! _________________
Listen Here
Now on iTunes
Search for "Black Gay Journeys"
Letter to the Editor,
The resolution on slavery before the Virginia legislature is not about how Black people can’t get over slavery as the gentleman from Hanover suggests. Rather, it is an attempt to measure how well or poorly the White race in this country has progressed. The fact that we have such contention over a resolution that would not require the Commonwealth to really do anything, truly signals to me that the time has not yet arrived when we can trust white folks to faithfully and justly legislate on behalf of any other group than themselves. If the white legislators are full of reject for the atrocities experienced by African Americans, not only in slavery, but also during centuries of discrimination, violence, and second-class citizenship, then what is the big deal? Tell me what is the big deal?! Black folks aren’t asking for much! It’s not like they want that forty acres and a mule. It’s not like they want every white person to apologize. On the other hand, if the white legislators are speaking against this legislation because they wouldn’t dare give Black folks license to think that they are as equal as White people, then I totally understand. Black folks just aren’t afforded the same comfort, equality, freedom, and pride as White folks.
New Feature Listen to this Entry
The resolution on slavery before the Virginia
legislature is not about how Black people can’t get over slavery as the
gentleman from Hanover suggests. Rather, it is a measure of how well or poorly
the White race in this country has progressed. Slavery is their issue. They are
the ones who dragged men, women, and children from their ancestral homeland and
enslaved them for centuries. They are the ones who philosophize democracy,
equality, and freedom and continue to deny these so-called universalities to
the great masses of colored people within their land. They are the ones who
must reconcile their moral contradiction. We will test them, that is for sure,
but ultimately they have to mature on their own. Unfortunately, until now and for
the foreseeable future, the benefits to white people from limiting equality
have exceeded the costs. Surely, one day the great mass of minorities will at
last wrestle this great land from the force of white power, striking a balance
between the white devil’s evil deeds and his subjects’ demand for reparations. On
that great morning when that Black hand taps that gavel in every courthouse,
lectures in every school house, and stands atop every executive mansion, the
Constitution, thus far an empty document, will come to life. Only the mass of
minorities can secure the American promise that all men are created equal, the
White race has never proved particularly competent in this way. Never forget
that those in power will never willingly surrender it for not a great war! Fight on!
NEW FEATURE
Senator Barack Obama announced today that he will form a presidential committee, which will help him decide whether he should seek the presidential nomination. I think this is a very BAD idea. If we simply look at history as to how likely his chances are, we see that they are pretty slim. One, the last sitting United States senator to become president was John F. Kennedy. To steal a line from Democratic vice-presidential nominee Lloyd Bentsen, sir you are no John F Kennedy. While Kennedy is remembered for his charisma, escalation of US-Soviet tension, and his tragic death, many people often forget his political career as a senator from 1953-1960. It is important for Obama to get settled in the Senate before he makes a decision to run for the Democratic nomination because it just as well may jeopardize his senatorial success. If the people of Illinois think that Obama is making an unsuccessful bid for the presidency and overlooking his senatorial duties, he might have to kiss his political career goodbye. Look at what happened to Doug Wilder in Virginia. In 1989, he achieved a historical victory as the first Black elected governor in the United States. Once in office, everyone had high hopes for the governor, but he ruined his opportunity as governor by running a HIGHLY
